Why Your Ballerina Stands and Watches - And Why That’s Okay
At Tiny Tutus, we often have little ballerinas who stand and watch, and we want you to know, that’s completely normal. Watching is part of how many toddlers and preschoolers learn. It’s not a sign of failure, and it’s certainly not wasted time. In fact, it’s often the start of something beautiful.
It happens every week, a tiny dancer with sparkly shoes and a pink tutu walks into her ballet class… and just stands there.
Sometimes it’s for a few minutes.
Sometimes it’s for the entire lesson.
Sometimes it’s for weeks.
And every time, a well-meaning adult asks the question:
“Why won’t she join in?”
Here’s the truth: she is. She’s just joining in with her eyes first.
Observation is a Superpower
At Tiny Tutus, we understand child development. We know that watching is often a child’s way of preparing themselves for participation. For some children, jumping straight in feels safe. For others, especially those who are shy, sensitive, or highly observant, they need to study the space, the people, and the rhythm of the class before taking part.
This is not laziness. This is not disinterest. This is processing.
What Looks Like “Doing Nothing” Is Actually Learning
When your child stands and watches:
- They’re learning the routine.
- They’re building trust with the teacher.
- They’re assessing where they fit in.
- They’re mentally rehearsing movements.
- They’re gaining confidence on the inside.
And when they do join in, it’s often with quiet certainty and a big smile.
What You Can Do As a Parent
This stage can feel frustrating or embarrassing. You might feel pressure from others, or guilt that your child isn’t “doing it properly.” Here’s what we suggest:
- Stay calm and patient. Children mirror your energy.
- Don’t force participation. A gentle “You’ve got this” is more effective than coaxing.
- Celebrate watching as success. They made it into the room. That matters.
- Keep showing up. Consistency builds comfort.
True Story: The Little One Who Watched for Five Weeks
In our studio at South Melbourne, we had a ballerina who stood behind her mum’s chair for the first five lessons. She never cried. She never moved. But she never left. And then, in week six, she walked into the circle, copied a plié, and never looked back.
That’s not a failure story. That’s a success story. And it’s more common than you think.
At Tiny Tutus, We Trust the Process
We don’t rush. We don’t judge. And we don’t label a child “naughty” or “disobedient” for standing still.
We simply welcome them, exactly where they are.